Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

Let me start off by saying this: Who would have thought that Mississippi State would be the model of coaching stability this year???

My friend Chris, diehard Razorback who lives in Fayetteville, called me this morning and said that one of the local news stations was reporting that Tommy Tuberville would be the next head coach at Arkansas. KNWA is reporting that “There is still a chance the situation can change but KNWA firmly believes the Auburn coach is close to an agreement.”

As I told Chris, Tuberville has a good thing going at Auburn. Sure, the facilities are not near the caliber of some SEC schools like Florida, Alabama, or Tennessee, but if it were me, I would not leave Auburn for Arkansas. Now I can understand if Tuberville still holds a personal grudge against boosters about the whole “Petrino to Auburn” thing while he was still the coach, but that school president is gone and that has not happened since. Of course, Chris used the famous Bear Bryant (he’s with Jesus you know) quote when he left Texas A&M to coach Alabama, “Mama called, and when Mama calls you gotta go home”.

Here’s my thing about anyone going to Arkansas: Remember what happened to Houston Nutt last summer??? Ever heard of the Freedom of Information Act??? Some of their fans have. For the most part, Razorback fans and Arkansans are nice and respectable people. But they sure have heard of FOIA’s, and some of them are not afraid to use them at the drop of a hat. If you use a state issued credit card to get 2 dozen Krispy Kremes for a coaches meeting, now you are unhealthy and need to go on a diet. If you make a call on a state issued cell phone to your local Jiffy Lube to ask how much an oil change is, now all of a sudden you’re not supporting the local cash cow by going to Wal-Mart to get your car serviced. If you drive your brand new state issued Chevy Suburban with OnStar to the local movie house to watch the IMax version of “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, now you practice witchcraft. Does anyone see how things can get twisted???

I still call b.s. on this for now, but then again, you just never know what will happen. It would be a good move for Arkansas, a bad move for Tuberville, and now throws Auburn’s name into those colleges who need a new coach.