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My Sports Superstitions
Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 24, 2007
With the my beloved Red Sox in the world series this year, I’m willing to freely admit I have sports superstitions that I regularly follow. I believe it’s scientific proof that superstition rituals work, just your superstition ritual has to greater than the superstition ritual of a fan on the opposing team. If your team is defeated 2 years in a row year, then it’s time to step your ritual.
I’ll break mine down by team and situation.
Red Sox vs. The (suck ass) Yankees: To ensure a victory for my Red Sox I like to find the direst, whiniest & most disgusting homeless person and throw unopened jars of baby food at them. If it isn’t Gerber then it ain’t shit.
Red Sox In The World Series: I throw a brick at every moron I find wearing a Nickelback t-shirt. I actually do that year around for good measure.
Pic courtesy of Outer-MonVOLia
Tennessee vs. Florida: I haven’t nailed this one down yet. Next year I believe if I fire a AK-47 at an impound lot at approximately at 4:30 AM while chanting “Tebo only scored 890 on the SAT” then that should do the trick.
Tennessee vs. Georgia: Right before each game I call my Ex to remind her of how much her mother resembles Uga. She moved and for awhile I couldn’t reach her, but damn that restraining order, for the past 2 years I’ve found her.
Tennessee vs. Alabama: For awhile it was reading from the memoirs of Mike DuBose, but now I’m stepping it up to text book burning.
Pic courtesy of LWS
Tennessee vs. South Carolina: Don’t have one, never have needed one.
Indy Colts vs. Anyone: Simple place a horses head in the bed of a fan from the opposing team.
That’s all the ones I currently do, but if you have any and would like to share feel free and post a comment. If you would like to try any of these for yourself feel free. I highly suggest throwing a brick at a Nickelback fan because I really really really hate that damn band.
So I profess on this day 10/24/07.
TtT
Big Orange Amy said
My husband brought up a good point about Tebow: If he wins the Heisman he might hit the draft earlier which means he could be out of our hair a bit earlier than we planned. This, coming from a dyed-in-the-wool Sox fan!
Also, you sure you want to burn the textbooks? Or just steal a few?
Sports collectibles said
Speakin of baseball, sure wish the Dbacks were still in the series.