Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

I’m the president of my condos association board of directors. The vice president is a Nebraska alum, for the past couple weeks he hasn’t exactly been thrilled with Cornhusker football. He’s been rather polite under the circumstances saying kinds things such as “GD Motherf*cking Callahan” & “Callahan is a p*ssy coach and they gave him a contract extension, those motherf*ckers!!”.

Yesterday the Athletic Director of Nebraska, Steve Pederson, was fired. I called the VP to see what his thoughts were about this, unfortunately I got his answering machine. He called back about 20 minutes later ecstatic about the news, apparently the reason he couldn’t come to phone was he was busy masturbating to the ESPN clip about the story that he taped. That’s the way most of the Nebraska fans feeling about this, but there is a problem. Bill Callahan, the Rachel Ray of Big 12 football coaches, is still there. How long after the season will he be fired remains to be seen.

“Nebraska athletic director Steve Pederson was fired Monday, two days after the school’s once-mighty football team was rocked with its worst home loss in nearly a half-century.

Callahan’s job is apparently safe for now. Chancellor Harvey Perlman said the next athletic director would decide the fate of the football staff.

Over the past two weeks, the Huskers (4-3) have lost by a combined score of 86-20, dropping a 41-6 decision at Missouri two weeks ago.

“There is no joy in my heart for having to do this,” Perlman said. He said it would cost at least $2.2 million to buy Pederson out of his contract.”

Callahan needs to face facts, the new AD which most praying Nebraska fans hope will be Tom Osborne, will be ordered to give the boot to Callahan. I find it ironic how schools with dominate football programs like Notre Dame and Nebraska fire coaches after good years, now couldn’t beat the home town high school football teams.

“Every one of you thinks this is because of a football game that was played last Saturday,” Pederson said. “It may well be that the vulnerability of the football program encouraged people to come forward when prior to that they had not.”

A search for an interim athletic director has begun, with the next step to find a permanent replacement.

“It is not clear how long such a process will take or its precise form,” Perlman said. “It is important it be done expeditiously but thoughtfully.”

Perlman said he would consult with Osborne about the direction of the athletic program, but stopped short of saying he would offer Osborne the interim athletic director’s job. Osborne now teaches a business leadership course at the university and is a consultant to local college athletic programs.”

Perlman look if you have to consult with Osborne why don’t you offer the flipping job to him? It’s that simple. If you here’s what will happen:

1. Donations and season ticket sales will be up.
2. Callahan will be fired
3. A quality coach will be hired
4. You’ll look a genius.

“We’ve come under a steady stream of criticism,” Callahan said. “It’s important you stand tall. You’ll be the direct target of critics. I understand that. You’re in the public eye and in a high position in order to lead. We’re going to continue to lead in a very positive manner.”

The steady stream of criticism is called losing and being mediocre. The only positive leadership you have supplied is teaching your players to lose with their heads held high.

“In four seasons under Callahan, the Huskers are 26-18 overall, 14-14 against the Big 12, 3-8 against teams in the Top 25 and 0-6 against the top 10. They have given up 40 points or more nine times.

Pederson has been a polarizing figure in Nebraska, widely criticized for firing coach Frank Solich and then for conducting a protracted one-man search for a new coach.

“I refuse to let the program gravitate into mediocrity,” Pederson said the day he announced Solich’s firing. “We won’t surrender the Big 12 to Oklahoma and Texas.”

I believe the players are praying for a new coach.

Wow, for someone who refuses to allow a program to slip, you suck. Nebraska football used to mean something, now it’s a joke. Black shirt defense? More like pink shirts with lace. Can Callahan save his job? Maybe but he’ll have to win out, and win big. This week they play A&M. While I believe Coach Fran. will be fired regardless, Callahan might not. But as my VP says “Fuck Callahan and this spread option offense, just run with power boy.”, he’s essentially correct. I believe Callahan is a goner as well.

Possible future coaches candidates are the same as every year with names like Steve God Spurrier, Bob Stoops, Tedford from Cal & Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez. One coach that might be a real possibility is Brooks from Kentucky, but I hope Tennessee makes a run at him as well.

So I profess on this day 10/16/07.

TtT